Brit songstress Lily Allen covered one of the greatest ever Beatles songs the Beatles never wrote, and the results are horrifying.

Allen took Electric Light Orchestra's "Mr. Blue Sky," an epic pop song that has all the knobs tweaked to  the max boundaries on the pop song scope, and she turned each of the dials up to 13. And, again, the results are horrifying, as you can see below.

Apparently she recorded it for a commercial advertising a French cell phone company, which, of course, makes it all better.

In related, yet surprising news, Wikipedia just told me the song was voted as Anthem of the Midlands in England, and is played before each Birmingham City Football(soccer) Club home game to honor ELO mastermind Jeff Lynne and his friendship with retired football(soccer!) player Trevor Francis.

And it is one of my top 5 fav. songs ever. But below is the Allen version:

When Same Beam was walking through the store he found beef iron and wine dietary supplements, so he decided to name his band after it.
Aside from Beam's Iron and Wine, that is also the story behind such artists as Brown Sugar and Cinnamon Pop Tarts, Nacho Cheese Combos, and Jimmy Tamale and the Taquitos.
Unlike the relatively new Taquitos, english professor Beam has been releasing music under the moniker Iron and Wine for quite some time now. I saw him a few years back on his tour supporting "Our Endless Numbered Days," a show where even whispering was even frowned upon, so listeners could hear singer/songwriter Beam's whispering vocal and light, light finger-picking...and occasional shoe-tapping.
Regardless, his music has since become increasingly lively, whereas on his recent album "Boy With A Coin" he turns the volume up from one to three. And it's super catchy, a great song, I suggest you check it out (it's right there below).

And the video is good! Sam graduated from Florida State University Film School with an MFA degree.

Applicants to become Fox's Next Great American Band hoped to advance and gain national exposure, but it appears that after the dust clears, even the winners may not be recognizable in their hometown.

The show is raking in DISMAL ratings, raking in ratings of 2 million viewers or better only once, the opening episode of the series, when 2.1 millions viewers tuned in.

And not many have returned...the show, from American Idol producers, has produced only very un-American Idol ratings, ranking in only the bottom tier — nowhere near the top —  of ratings each week.

But, whatevs. That just means that venues everywhere won't be flooded by hack artists, who made a name for themselves on a reality show.

Regardless, I don't know whether you have been watching, but none of the remaining acts would receive my nod of a great American band.

• Light of Doom, Black Sabbath in its early teenage years, lacks substance, though the lead singer can produce that impressive throaty vocal.
• Denver and the Mile High Orchestra have no songwriting talent whatsoever, unable to write a melody you could hum, but since they have 67 people in the band, that's AWESOME!!!
• The Clark Brothers...alright, I haven't heard them.
• Sixwire is the best band of the bunch, with GREAT harmonies, a solid, tight sound, and a good Gap look... whatever that's worth to ya... but I still would never buy their album.

Regardless, these groups have a lot to aim and aspire for, as proven by winners of the first  reality show band, VH1's 'Bands on the Run,' Flickerstick! A real household name, nowadays.

Go here to read about Queens of the Stone Age, but first, check out the great underground band in this video:

Now, go back to the article to read another rich rock star cry because he signed a contract with a label that he isn't happy with. Who is? Am I the only music fan who is just incredibly sick of hearing these "artists" whine? The labels give them national exposure and an opportunity, and then when the nature of the music business shifts and the band is left without listeners, it's always the label's fault for not supporting them sufficiently.

Sorry Josh Homme, it isn't that the label is inhibiting you from truly expressing yourself that is leaving you with lukewarm critical reviews and lukecold album sales, rather, it is because you haven't written any hit songs since Dave Grohl was in your band.

So there.

U2 is getting ready to release a new album, possibly a double album? The aging rockers are trying a new sound, frontman Bono told Website therockradio.com, one that has "trance, metal and Moroccan influences."

"It's not like anything we've ever done before, and we don't think it sounds like anything anyone else has done either," said the Bono.

He said the were influenced by a music festival in Morroco.

"It was a real humbling thing for a punk rock shouter, listening to these people who just close their eyes for 40 minutes and sing the most sophisticated melodies."

There is no word yet who the punk rocker was that Bono spoke of.

The Grammy nominations were announced this week, and again you are left with half your hair in your hand...after pulling it out.

So many confusing choices, so little time to discuss them. John Fogerty, Foo Fighters, Bruce Springsteen, Wilco and DAUGHTRY were up for best rock album of the year. You may as well say green, blue, red, yellow and PUKE GREEN are up for color of the year.

Which is being chosen at the First Annual Sesame Street Awards! It's guaranteed to be awesome!

Critics remembered they liked the skinny guy Beck, as he has been nominated for a Grammy Best Solo Rock Vocal Performance for iTunes-only release "Timebomb," which I would say is easily his best single release since anything off the "Midnight Vultures" album.

There is a Best Alternative Album award...did you know that? Why?

Ozzy Osbourne was nominated for Best Hard Rock Performance with "I Don't Wanna Stop," which left us fans saying, didn't he stop? Is he alive still? Really? He is up for a Grammy??? OH!

And possibly strangest of all, Herbie Hancock is up for album of the year with his jazz album of Joni Mitchell songs, aptly titled "The Joni Letters." INTERESTING! Some say, if won, it will make up for the huge snub he received when Judges overlooked song "Rockit" for Record
of the Century.

• I think anyone would agree that Kid Rock could use the accompaniment on an ordained minister on his tours, so I welcome this news: Run-DMC's Rev. Run will be accompanying Rock on all the dates of his upcoming Rock and Roll Revival Tour.
And in breaking Rock Blog news, two of my favorite performers  are soon to share the stage! Mr. Rock will join Larry the Cable Guy in the upcoming "Larry the Cable Guy Christmas Spectacular."

• Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band have announced three 2008 tour stops at United Kingdom football stadiums.

• Myspace users will be given an opportunity to listen to and purchase Myspace-exclusive unplugged recordings from James Blunt before Blunt makes his upcoming appearance on VH1's One-Hit Wonders.
The performance is reportedly the start of a Myspace unplugged series.

• More than 400 bands, many of which are British acts such as Radiohead, are teaming up to take on Web giants such as eBay.com to quash the resale of concert tickets on their sites.
The new venture is known as the Resale Rights Society.

• Don't mess with Illinois! Rockers from my native state, Wilco, are teaming up with Barak Obama, the presidential hopeful from my native state, for "Change Rocks," a concert and campaign fundraiser on Friday night at the Riviera Theatre in Chicago.
The golden nugget of this news clip, though, is the lineup, one that includes other Chicagoan acts of Cool Kids, Canasta and the Changes(nice market ploy, organizers! CHANGES ROCK, too!!), but also Third Eye Blind's Stephan Jenkins and Jill Sobule.
One hadn't been seen since 1999 and the other Kissed a Girl.

Japanese government officials let out a collective "Weiland!!!" and a "Blast it!" earlier this week, after news surfaced that he last night he, again, was arrested for impaired driving.

TMZ.com delivered the news, along with a short, but not sweet police report of the incident. Velvet Revolver frontman Scott Weiland was driving on a Los Angeles, Cal., road on Thanksgiving Eve when he wrecked his car, and California Highway Patrol Officials then recognized an old acquaintance, under-the-influence Weiland.

Why are Japanese government officials in some sort of despair? Well, maybe its more of a collective "I told you so" after they banned Weiland's Velvet Revolver from performing in their country because of their troubled past, as reported on the Rock Blog last week. The band issued a statement indicating they had no clue why this would have happened, and a week later, Mr. Weiland must have been deep in thought about the issue when...BAM! DUI.

No one was injured in the wreck, and Weiland's camp issued statements indicating that they are fighting for his innocence.

American motorcycle daredevil Evel Knievel (Pronouned "EVIL!" Like the doctor") died this week, 49, 47, 46, 44, 41, etc., years after he probably should have in the first place.

Knievel, whose first name is really Bobby and was not a doctor, became famous for several televised death-defying motorcycle jumps in the '60s and '70s, including jumps in the Astrodome, over the Mississippi River and over the Snake River Canyon in Idaho.

For this, he deserves a giant "Stand in the Place Where You Live" Salute from the Rock Blog.

And, the most remarkable news the Rock Blog has dug up on this man was not the terrible sins and crimes he committed over his reckless life, but it was the ROCK OPERA that depicted it.

That's right. Currently Broadway gets to see the rollercoaster ups and downs of Knievel's life in the aptly named ROCK OPERA 'Knievel.' Written by Jeff Bek, not to be confused with dead guitarist Jeff Beck, the rock opera features high-decibal classic rock, pulling pages out of the textbooks of Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, etc., and tells the gritty tales of Knievel's life, one that saw prostitution, domestic violence, drugs and more.

And, on that note, Knievel didn't severely injure Bek with an aluminum baseball bat like he did Sheldon Saltman, the author of Evel Knievel on Tour, a book that told of Knievel's dark life. Knievel put metal plates in Saltman's arm as a result.

And that wasn't very Rock Blog salutable. But that was all before he accepted Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior, and publicly making the announcement earlier this year.

And according to ABCnews.com, to those of you, and me, who think he may just have been panicking in the last days of his life (he was suffering from a liver transport, diabetes and hepatitis), he had this to tell us:

"Let them say what they want to say. I'm a long ways from dying."

• Never mind when we tried to tell you that Weezer's upcoming album already had a title for it, 'Tout Ensemble,' it was a hoax. And three cheers to the hoax creators for coming up with an entirely off-the-wall name like 'Tout Ensemble.'

• Big sales are in the forecast! The Weather Channel's first entry into the music industry realm, The Weather Channel Presents: The best of Smooth Jazz, is number 2 this week on Billboard's top contemporary jazz charts.
I had already been talking about the weather.

• And when asked for an encore, Kings of Leon like to bring the house down. Oh, so literally.

• Interpol cousins The Editors have announced an extensive 2008 tour, one that will feature the Hot, Hot Heat.

• Radiohead, too, decided to try this live music thing out, as they have confirmed that in 2008 they will hit a few festivals in Germany. It is rumored the tour will start in the U.S., though.
Panic ensued soon after the announcement, because no strange bears or hieroglyphics were used to tell the secret message. Something must be wrong with Radiohead!

One of my fav. bands of all time — Ben Folds Five — playing a really rock blog-worthy song:

Don't tell my day job, but I am applying for jobs right now, and a daunting task is to fill my resume with interesting and impressive stuff — Saved a whale, restored sight to Stevie Wonder, ate 5 Egg McMuffins yesterday  — but it's just not that easy.

So maybe I'll become a rock star. They don't even need resumes. Rather, they only need bio sheets that tell what AWESOME bands they have performed with, and how many thousands of screaming fans they have performed for, and how many Myspace friends they have.

But, as we all know, the business world is quickly turning, so resumes may be a must now for aspiring rock stars, and what better way to pad your resume than to attend the School of Rock? Jack Black has nothing to do with the rock schools featured in this Washington Post article, rather, only the illustrious Paul Green does.

The Paul Green School of Rock Music is leading the charge in a wave of rock schools. It was started in 1998, five years before the hit film "School of Rock," but the movie certainly didn't hurt matters, as the company is rapidly expanding with 34 schools currently open across the country and a plan to have 100 by 2009.

The school has also been bragged on by the Boston Globe and New York Times, and named one of the top "10 Franchises We Love" by Star Treatment magazine.

The schools enlist students ages 7-18 and provide them 45 minute private lessons on the instrument of the their choice. Students also rehearse to prepare them for "THE SHOW," tributes for mainstage rock acts, including past homages to Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, Queen, and the Beatles.

They then send "Wish You Were Here" post cards to all their friends and family back home.

After they teach them how to rock, both musically AND mentally, even teaching them how to look and act like a rock star, they even turn the most prized students into a bonafide touring rock band, complete with impossible backstage demands. "Green skittles only, please. And when I say 'please,' I mean NOW."

My only question is, if you suck up to the teacher at the School of Rock, does it get you anywhere? That's not very rock and roll.

Rock bloggers, fasten your seatbelts and set your phasers to "stun," because this will catch you by surprise!

WONDERFUL surprise! The Weather Channel has released an album!

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! You got a little bit excited there! Not the Weather Girls, the Weather Channel! And it won't be "Raining Men," but there may be some light showers in the forecast...

The cable channel is releasing its first album, 'The Weather Channel Presents: Best of Smooth Jazz,' and all the meteorologists pump their fists in excitement.

The 12-song record features the Channel's most requested music by artists such as Dave Koz, Najee, Chick Corea, Pieces of a Dream, Joyce Cooling and Bill Nye the Science Guy.

OK, so Bill won't be making an appearance.

Apparently, the 25-year-old Weather Channel has been playing rock-tastic music since thunderstorms and tornadoes have translated into ratings. In the beginning, employees would dip into their own record collections, and it was obvious from the start that viewers liked it.

"When we'd play `Peanuts' they went bananas," Weather Channel Vice President of Licensing Shari Pace told Yahoo.com, not realizing the multiple references to food in her sentence. She must have been hungry.

"The phones started ringing," she added, and then ate her phone.

And now hopefully the cash registers will, too. The album was released in early October. Buy it!

• Canadian indie rock stars Arcade Fire joined Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band last night in Ontario, Canada to sing songs and dance! See below for video. Those darn hippies and their long hair.
In further news, the E Street Band tour is being paved across the world.

In furtherer news, the band has lost a keyboard player for that tour, as Danny Federici has been forced to quit the tour due to health reasons.

• Weezer has a name for its sixth album: 'Tout Ensemble,' an in-depth perspective of what it's like to be a rock and roll nerd in a rock and roll fantasy.

• Set aside the bludgeoning drunk stories for the time being, Amy Winehouse killed a hamster last year! And his name was Georgie Porgie! The hamster's owner, Palladium lead singer Peter Pepper (Whose name isn't much better than Georgie Porgie) was quoted recently, saying the hamster had bit his hand, and then the manic Winehouse disappeared with it, and it was soon dead.

"I've never directly accused her of killing my hamster as I'm too scared. She can be quite fierce," Pepper told NME.com. "That day
last year was quite traumatic. Not only did I have to deal with a dead hamster, but for some reason Amy had also managed to unplug the freezer and flooded the whole kitchen and utility room. She can be a bit mental sometimes."

• Radiohead's Johnny Greenwood is loved by critics AND Hollywood! as he is considered a favorite to win an Oscar for his score for Paul Thomas Anderson's new film, There Will Be Blood.

The movie is slated for a February 2008 release, and outside sources agree: artsy loves fartsy.

"It's a bit menacing and difficult to listen to at times, but Hollywood loves that," the anonymous movie source told Yahoo.com. "A gold statuette could be on its way to Oxford."

 

The rebel rockers of Velvet Revolver can't help but let their Japan fanbase down, as government officials recently refused their visas to the country, in-turn canceling the upcoming Nov. 26-30 tour over there in support of their new album 'Libertad.'
The government issued a statement explaining that it was due to the band's shady criminal history. The band, on the other hand, can't understand it at all.

Neither can we at the Rock Blog, but we thought we'd try to piece together some ideas...in bullet form.
- Maybe they read the newly-published book from aging rocker Slash (legally known as SAUL Hudson. SAUL!), 42,ramming his BMW into a parked van.
- Perhaps they are scared Scott will bring his wife, who wanted to get Scott some REALLY hot clothes. She burnt $10,000 worth of his clothes. Scott shoulda been arrested, too, because no one needs $10,000 worth of leather pants.
- Or maybe it was because of their tourmates on the bill, other drug-troubled, heroin rock Seattle act, Alice In Chains. Maybe better off, Weiland could use some new friends, preferably the clean ones.
- Maybe they heard about Weiland ramming his BMW into a parked van while under the influence of drugs in July 2004, following previous felony charges for both cocaine and heroin possession, but didn't realize he recently finished serving his 3-year probation for all of this.
- Maybe they didn't hear about bassist Duff McKagan, who quit both Guns N' Roses and drinking in the mid-'90s, and then headed to Seattle University to get a finance and accounting degree, of all things.
- They don't like Slash's top hat, and were gravely disappointed when it was recovered.

In some related news, Weiland is going to serve up some of these possible reasons in memoir form. Can we expect the book's writing to be as scattered as the musician is himself? YES.

For those of you who don't know, I am the Dada Rock VJ by night, but a newspaper reporter by day. I conduct dozens of interviews a week, some go really well, some don't.

And its those that go really poorly that I wish someone would have caught on tape...kinda like the one above.

You can link here to check out the official story on npr.org, about the interview with Iceland dreamin', mellow-tastic artists Sigur Ros, broadcast on NPR's radio program the Bryan Park Project, but I can also pull a quote from interviewer Luke Burbank, which quickly sums it up in one sentence:

"The band showed up ... to give what is possibly the worst interview in the history of electronic media."

And they're not joking.

This was bad, take it from someone who has been on Luke's end of the microphone...well, figuratively speaking. Audio from my interviews isn't blasted over airwaves for thousands to hear, which made this even worse, or funnier.

What do you all think? Was this funny? I was laughing REAL LOUD, but that may just be the reporter inside me.

As NPR noted in the article, regardless of this lifeless, dragging, mundane interview, they really enjoy Sigur Ros. And I must agree, they're a good band. Check 'em out!

• BlasFAMOUS Brit-rock vets Oasis are at it again...recording an album? Yes, that, too, but I'm primarily talking about yapping.
Here's an excerpt from a Billboard.com article about their upcoming album, which is wrapping up recording now and slated for an August '08 release:

Gallagher said "without a doubt" the untitled released would compare to the seventh U.K. albums of the Beatles and the Rolling Stones, "Revolver" and "Beggars Banquet" respectively. "There's lots of cool parts, man," he said. "Really, we're throwing everything at it."

That is what "Revolver" is. The album considered by many to be the greatest all time is, to sum it up, "a lot of cool parts."

• Weezer has confirmed they have finished recording their sixth record, which remains without a title or a release date. I don't really care about either one of those, as much as I care whether it contains any actual good music, much unlike the previous three albums.

• In very much related news, Weezer bassist Scott Shriner is performing at a convention for funny, funny TV show The Office, as he will play guest bassist in Scranton guitar rock outfit The Scrantones, the band that wrote that rinky-dinky, yet whimsical, theme for the show.
Go here to check out this band's Myspace site. You won't be sorry.

• You can watch Dave Grohl in all his cinematic glory here. The band has recorded so many videos, and all of them are quirky and fun, but if only every one of them featured Dave popping some Mentos.

• Radiohead's Thom Yorke turned down a request from rock royalty to sing a duet. Come on, Thom! I know you're super smart and you've got the most genius-looking cowlick of anyone I've ever seen, but where would you be today without Paul McCartney!

I'm Not There — the film that chronicles the life of Bob Dylan on top of an all-star collaboration covering songs by the MVP songsmith.

I wish I was there — the story about how Matt the Dada Rock VJ was sad he wasn't in New York City last night to see the all-star lineup play those songs.

Some of my FAVORITE MUSICIANS rocked out, mumbled and wheezed out those Bob Dylan tunes at the Bacon Theatre in the Big Apple...members of My Morning Jacket, Yo La Tengo, Calexico, Dinosaur Jr., The Roots and many, many more performed throughout the night. Such songs were jammed as "The Times, They are a Changin'," "All Along the Watchtower," and many of Dylan's deep cuts.

Of 19 reviews gathered by film snobbery site Rottentomatoes.com, most everyone is giving the film positive reviews, though no one is really that positive about it, critics have given it an average rating of 6.5/10. But, as happens once in a rare while, it appears the soundtrack will outdo the movie, which only makes sense, considering the star of each.

The music snobbery all stars at Pitchforkmedia.com gave the album a 8/10 rating, which, like that brutal professor with the big beard and bigger belly, is an outstanding marking by their standards.

The album features appearances by:
• The Hold Steady
• Mark Lanegan of The Screaming Trees
• Pavement's Stephen Malkmus
• Sufjan Stevens
• Willie Nelson
• Wilco
• Bob Dylan

And five songs on the double-album soundtrack feature backing music from The Million Dollar Bashers, a supergroup featuring Sonic Youth's Lee Ranaldo and Steve Shelley, Wilco guitarist Nels Cline, Television guitarist Tom Verlaine, Dylan bassist Tony Garnier, guitarist Smokey Hormel and keyboardist John Medeski.

The question here is, where will all of this go? The movie's lukewarm reviews may not be enough to propel the limited-release film (out in the U.S. Nov. 21) into the mainstream, and the same could be said for each of the album's performers. Each one deserves notoriety, but none are about to blaze a trail on Billboard on their own. Could I be wrong? Will this album make My Morning Jacket into superstars??

Go here to find a few the tracks off the album. They sound great. Go here to find the movie's trailer.

And GO HERE to find some funny Bob Dylan videos.

The results are still rolling in... And will continue to do so for years to come.

In a study conducted by Internet research group ComScore, it was found that Radiohead's priceless gamble was a failure... [but, come on, we won't know for sure for years to come]

According to the study, with the digital release of their new album "In Rainbows" in early October, 38% paid an average of $6, and the rest just didn't pay.

And to further break down the numbers, of the paying crowd, 17 percent paid less than $4, 6 percent paid $4-8, 12 percent paid $8-12 and 4 percent paid more.

One guy tried to pay much more than that, but failed.

Some record execs may have been greedily rolling their fingers together, saying a Monty Burns-esque "Eeeeeeexcellent...", but not most, the smart ones know that even if these numbers are accurate, it means anything but defeat.

Thom Yorke told Time Magazine just prior to the priceless release:
"I like the people at our record company, but the time is at hand when you have to ask why anyone needs one. And, yes, it probably would give us some perverse pleasure to say '(expletive) you' to this decaying business model."

I don't know whether I, personally, am ready to side with Yorke and say the industry is "decaying." I am very, very willing to say it is evolving, at an unbelievable rate, and the way it reacts to this not-so-subtle turn of events is how to decipher whether it is decaying.

The industry is scrambling to react, and a jumble of fresh, innovative ideas have come to the surface. Take a quick look at the marketing of Matchbox 20's new album, "Exile on Mainstream," as the band's label has released 11 versions of the album...altered versions sold online between iTunes and VH1.com, and retail sales at Wal-Mart and Target.

They even are marketing a bracelet "album," including 17 songs, plus video interviews and a digital booklet with album art, is now on sale for about $35 at Best Buy.

It's hard to think that with all this confusion and scattering going on in the industry that the art itself isn't going to suffer. What kind of legitimate artist would want their album chopped up into 11 different versions?

Regardless, at this point it may be too late. The rug may have been completely pulled out from underneath the record industry, and this battle may be lost.

Because, what we have here is a failure to communicate. The now-more-jaded-than-ever relationship between the record industry and the artist is like that of an abusive boyfriend and his girlfriend...after years of torment, she finally realizes that she has some legitimate power and she's packing her things...and now it's up to the boyfriend, or record execs, to shape up and change its ways.

But now EMI, Radiohead's disgruntled former label, has done anything but buy the band flowers.

In the latest set of news, hey have reissued all of the band's first six albums. Good news? Not even at first glance.. if you cared enough about Radiohead to shovel out $80 for this set then you would have owned the first six records already.
But it's upon second glance that this is really ugly. According to The Daily Swarm, the band had nothing whatsoever to do with this release, not even their blessing. EMI pulled this out in an underhanded attempt to regain money they expected to earn from "In Rainbows."

Though I am not willing yet to say the record industry it decaying, I am willing to say it is full of greedy, spiteful dirtbags.

UPDATE: Now there are reports, seemingly legitimate reports, that EMI are even bigger jerks. Each time a Google user would type a search for Radiohead, they would be met with Google ads stating that they were selling their new album,
"In Rainbows," as a boxed set. This couldn't be further from the truth.

Notice the rock on this pigeon's beak??

PUT HIM ON THE ROCK BLOG!!!

Two days in a row on the rock blog! Yea! What's that, Ozz...you're excited, too? Nonono, don't bite the head off that cat, I believe ya!

Ozzy has been busy! After standing up for Britney a few weeks back, yesterday he and tour-mate Rob Zombie drew headlines after a North Dakota Sheriff's Department invited folks wanted for ignored court summons to a pre-metal concert jamboree, in what was an AWESOME sting, baby! ..and today he was in the news again.

The aging rocker(58) is going to play about 90 shows after it's all said and done this year. That's more than he's ever done. Why? Because recent release "Black Rain" isn't selling, and he's gotta pay the electric bill somehow!

Osbourne told an Australian pub:

"I've been suffering terribly from people downloading it. If they don't find something to stop it, people won't be able to make records. There won't be any new bands. How are they going to survive?"

(With or without an MTV reality show?)

"I've never done in a long time as many live shows as I'm doing now. This year I've done 90 shows. I'm an old-timer, I've been doing it 40 years now, but new bands are going to suffer. It's ridiculous, you could be doing it for nothing."

Sorry, Ozzy, I like you (As a Cubs fan, I'll always have a place for you in my heart), but according to Last.fm, a Website that learns what users are listening to on their computers (and it is becoming a very accountable tool for learning what people are actually listening to, since Ozzy is right and no one is buying albums anymore), NO ONE IS LISTENING TO OZZY'S ALBUM. The lead single, "I Don't Want to Stop," had been listened to 1,380 times last week, which didn't even come CLOSE to cracking the top 400 ("Sweet Child O' Mine" rang in at 400 with 5,100 listens).

And just for further comparison's sake, the #1 song, "15 Step" by Radiohead, rang up 108,000 listens! Eat that!

Or at least bite the head off it! (Bringin' tha joke back, oh yea!!)

Ozzy, I, too, am against illegal downloads, but that PROBABLY is NOT THE ISSUE HERE. The issue may..be..the..quality.

And, really, what's happening here? Ozzy Osbourne is narcing on bad guys, now he's speaking out against ILLEGAL downloads??? Does anyone else see this irony?

Ozzy Osbourne fans BE WARNED!! The cops are onto you...

In a very sneaky, yet creative turn of events in Fargo, North Dakota last night, roughly 40 convicts who were wanted for such things as ignored court summons, unpaid traffic violations, unpaid child support and more, were invited to a pre-party before an Ozzy Osbourne concert.

But, the party turned out to be a well-planned sting operation, and before the outlaw participants could even flash some "metal," they were greeted with handcuffs.

According to Cass County Sheriff Paul D. Laney, some criminals can appreciate a good dose of irony, even if it lands them in a jail cell.

“Some actually thought it was pretty funny,” he told the West Central Tribune newspaper. "Others were upset, with a couple who turned hostile. I think they were upset with themselves for being had.”

Some good, positive thinking on Laney's part. I'm not so sure the criminals thought to themselves, how dare I be so dumb! Falls right in line with mothers telling their children that bullies only make fun of children who they are jealous of...or eat your broccoli, or you don't get a Nintendo Wii.

Regardless, in my day job I cover crime for a daily newspaper in Clarksville, Tenn. I want to show this article to our Sheriff's Office and say, "See! Now THAT'S PIZAZZ!! Some real style at this department!"

What better song could they have chosen?

A familiar voice is creeping back on mainstream radio, and let me give you a hint — it's greasy.

AXL Rose. The one, the only. The myth, the man, the guy who has let down fans since 1993, can be heard on a new single from rapper Sebastian Bach, a cover of Aerosmith's "Back in the Saddle Again."

Go here to "learn more."

So, with the song's release, which quickly became the number 1 requested song on the Texas rock station it was leaked on, one can only ask, is Axl soon to be back in the saddle again?

According to Rolling Stone early this month, Amazon.com has slated Guns N' Roses' "Chinese Democracy," the most infamous album to never to be released, for a Feb. 12 release.

But really, what are listeners in store for? If you follow the links and hear the featured song, I'd like your thoughts, but I believe Axl sounded pretty good. His vocals are a bit lower than they used to be, and he hung on some low notes rather than foaming to the top like he used to, but overall, it sounded pretty strong.

And the interest is there. There is no other reason other than Axl that this song became the number one requested song. None. "Back in the Saddle Again." A played out classic rock tune that was never that special in the first place? It probly even left Aerosmith shrugging their shoulders.

"'Back in the Saddle Again?' Really? That song?'"

According to Billboard.com, Radiohead was the most blogged about artist for the second week in a row last week. NO SURPRISE THERE.

And add me to that list.

According to number crunching by a blogger at Independent Media site The Seminal, established acts now have 6-10 million reasons to start averting record labels:

• According to a source close to the band, In Rainbows has “sold” approximately 1.2 million copies as of October 12th. In comparison, that’s more albums sold in the first week than Radioheads’ last three releases combined. According to an Internet poll of 3,000 people, the average price paid for In Rainbows was $8. If these numbers are accurate, Radiohead has made close to $10 million in one week on this album alone.

Alright, Dada Rock Bloggers, buckle your rock belts, it's going to be a bumpy ride into uncharted territory (No pun intended).
I suppose it has always been that way to some extent — the industry had to adjust to cassette tape dubbing, the rise and fall of 8-tracks, and Elvis Presley, so why not this?

Well, those were relatively small hurdles compared to what they are up against now. Now they are scrambling to analyze a billion different data sets to find out which approaches will be most profitable, or will lose them the least amount of money. Apparently one of these chosen approaches is to sue many of the illegal downloaders for each song downloaded, including Jammie Thomas.

Perhaps she was chosen for her hip, music-friendly first name? But Jammie was definitely chosen to be made an example of. If you are a strong advocate of illegal downloads, you can donate to the Minnesotian single mother's fund now, she's $225,000 in the hole now.

So far about $16,000 has been donated. "Free Jammie, Free Everybody," a slogan on the site says. Give me a break, if we raise the money to disspell Jammie's sentence, then everyone enjoys free music?

Probably  not. I was actually just reading an expert opinion that one day soon music will be charged
as a utility, monthly service fees, etc. Napster and Yahoo! Music already charge monthly, but I guess this would be an all-encompassing measure.

This is something more for deadbeats to down their friends about.

"Hey, Harry, can I use your phone?"
"No, it got disconnected last month. Didn't pay the bill, dude."
"Come on! Alright, Harry, let's get some tunes rockin', then! This party has gots to KICK!"
"Uh, sorry, man..."

Amongst many '80s all-star acts, Jammie reportedly downloaded some Metallica, which leads me to wonder, whatever happened to Lars Ulrich? Why did he stop speaking out against piracy? Maybe because people HATE HIM for it?

• Bruce Springsteen is tops in FOUR charts, four weeks into his album's sales. Granted, this was a weak week in record sales, but still, a notable achievement.
For more Bruce news, read about a blistering live set in L.A. right here.

• This wouldn't have happened if Michael Hall were in the band! Follow the link to see a HUGE folly on Van Halen's reunion tour. Couldn't have happened to a nicer group of guys!

• Daughtry, featuring American Idol rocker Chris Daughtry, is heading out on tour, starting with an opening slaught for teenage heart throbs of Bon Jovi!
Follow the afore-link to find a video of Chris coming "Home."

• Switchfoot's Jon Forman and Matthew T. of Relient K have teamed up on their "Appetite for Construction" tour, and according to one blogger, it is called "Rebuild" and will be featured on iTunes shortly.

• David Bowie is doing a guest spot on "Spongebob Squarepants." Rumor is he's going to be singing "Ziggy Starfishdust."

Jon Bon Jovi slowly applied the anti-aging cream to the crows' feet around his eyes, and then he said on the phone to The All-American Rejects:

"So, you think you can pull off 'Livin' on a Prayer' in Phoenix? It's in G."

The All-American Rejects confidently replied, "Oh yea, I sang that ALL THE TIME in third grade, when my older sister played the cassette tape."

(Repeat conversation with My Chemical Romance, Daughtry, Gretchen Wilson and Big and Rich, all Bon Jovi's supporting acts during the 10-show, one stop journey, at the Prudential Center in Newark, NJ)

Come on, Jon Bon (45) and the boys! Age graciously! Play a show with Celine Dion.

The music industry continues to point at itself.

"Who, me?"

Yes, you. You're in big, big trouble.

This week Bruce was number 1 on the Billboard Charts again with "Magic," regaining the lead from Kid Rock's "Rock and Roll Jesus" (Shucks!).

Though this may seem triumphant, it's a lot more yawn-tastic. The total sales translated to 77,000, an astronomically low total for a chart topper.

To place it into perspective, album sales are down 4.9 percent from last week at 7.93 million units, and a 19.6 percent decrease from the same week in 2006 (9.86 million units).

To place it further into perspective, the Transformers DVD sold 8.3 million copies, more than all the 7.93 million albums sold altogether.

I heard they are releasing a new Transformer — a record exec that turns into a hobo.

Ahh yes, going to camp.

Campfires. Innocently flirting with girls. Ponds. Bunk beds. Marshall half-stack amps.

"Mom, I want to go to Rock and Roll Fantasy Camp!"
"Well, son, don't worry, because it's COMING TO YOU!"

The Camp is taking a 25-city tour this coming year, allowing ordinary people trade licks with primetime rock stars. Like who? Well, performers have yet to be announced, but just to give you a taste, according to the afore-linked Billboard.com article the tour will be based on a particular Sept. 10, 2006 session in Columbus, Ohio, a day that produced such blockbuster rock stars as Kelly Keagy of Night Ranger, Simon Kirke of Bad Company, and Gunnar Nelson of, well, Nelson.

Other Rock and Roll Fantasy Camps have been held in L.A., Vegas, and New York City, but developers must see it like you and I — nothing says rock and roll getaway quite like Columbus, Ohio.

Each tour stop, reportedly at House of Blues-ish locations, will invite 80-100 participants at $2,000 (!) a ticket. I mean, we are potentially talking Gunnar Nelson here, are we not?

What Would You Say...if someone tried to sell you Radiohead's "In Rainbows" for $12?

"Naw, man, I can get it for 12 CENTS on their Website! Gimme a break!!!" is how 95 percent of conversations would go, I expect.

But what do I know??? Apparently not as much as those at ATO, as word is becoming clearer and clearer that this will be their new home, the label to release "In Rainbows."

Why are people going to pay for this? For the cover art? Have you seen their cover art? They could have a bunch of pizzas speaking to each other, each one repeating the letter "L" 52 times with a British flag in the background, and I wouldn't even have to look twice.

Yep, Radiohead.

The ATO label is an interesting choice, too, as it was co-founded by Marching Ant Dave Matthews, and has produced releases from jammies like the North Mississippi All-Stars and Gov't Mule, but they also have one of my fav. bands, My Morning Jacket.

Word is they are one step closer to signing on the line.

You might be Kid Rock if...you and your entourage get into a fight at a Waffle House.

Come on, Kid! And here I was, just about to sympathize for you!

...OK, so I do sympathize for you. A grown man with millions of dollars in the bank that still feels like he needs to pick on others to be big. And I'm not sure what he was doing at the Waffle House in Atlanta, Ga. in the first place...I live in the South right now, about an hour outside of Nashville, and there are a billion of those places around me, and I really don't know what he was doing there.

And whose even in this entourage? Jethro Clampet from the Hillbillies, and the Tazmanian Devil?

Well, maybe he was having some "Grits Sandwiches for Breakfast," the name of his 1991 major label debut. Surprisingly enough, it didn't sell and he was left out on the curb. Even more surprisingly, though, seven years later he was discovered by Carson Daly (The man who saved the face of rock and roll as we know it! CARSON!!!!), and it was no time before people were saying words like "Bawitdaba."

And the rest is trashy, trashy history.

That trashy history most recently developing into a top-selling album for Rock a few weeks back with "Rock and Roll Jesus." Though "top-selling" may be a little dubious, as it translates to only 170,000 albums sold.

STOP buying his albums! PLEASE!

And what would happen then? go here to sound off!

• It's a well known fact that Coca Cola used to include cocaine as an actual ingredient. It's a lesser known fact that Chris Cornell did, too.
So is that why the company chose him for the 2008 My Coke Fest, held in Cape Town, South Africa? You'll have to ask Coke execs.
Other artists confirmed are Muse, The Kaiser Chiefs and Good Charlotte. Not the biggest deal bands, at least not compare to last year's headliners that weren't, Guns N' Roses.

• Weezer frontman Rivers Cuomo is to release a collection of solo recordings from between 1992 and 2007. Word is he recorded them on a Tascam 688, a piece of recording equipment he bought in 1990 after he convinced his mom to co-sign on a credit card application with him.
Word is he is selling this with the intent of finally paying the card off. Credit card interest SUCKS!

• Brits worship Noel Gallagher. Still. I don't really know why. NME.com chronicles his and Liam's every move, including this Noel's surprise performance on lead guitar during The Coral's performance on a BBC program.
Apparently he skipped practice and performed on the cusp! (Gasp!)

• In very un-rock-related news, Ace of Base is joining up for a reunion tour! Three points to the rocker who can find me a story on this.

The commercialism of rock and roll has become more and more mainstream and acceptable, but sometimes limits have to be set.

WHO are you and WHAT did you do with BOB!! That's what I say to the mustached man in this commercial. He appeared to be Bob Dylan in every sense, except for the fact he is endorsing Cadillac, and, even more out of the ordinary, is riding around the desert in a Cadillac Escalade.

This generation of classic rockers is no stranger to commercials at this point. Cadillac has long been running Led Zeppelin music in its commercials, and The Who has been in countless commercials, including sad half hour infomercial spots by singer Roger Daltrey, selling his music and that of his competitors' of yesterday in the Time-Life "Legends" classic rock compilations.

"This is the best collection of classic rock I've ever seen, and I'm proud to be a part of it," Daltrey stated in the news release. "If you like to rock, if you like guitars, if you like bands like Led Zeppelin, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Bad Company and
, then you're going to love Time-Life's "Legends" Collection."

I'm sorry, but I don't think Brit-pop/punk rock co-founder Daltrey is the best source for where to find the best Skynyrd.

But, again, rockers and commercials are becoming better friends each day, making such senseless quotes that much more easy to swallow.

This wasn't the first commercial for Dylan. He also lended his music and image to a Gap commercial last year. Though he was only strumming a guitar, not steering a giant black S.U.V.

Dylan was plugging his relatively new XM radio program, so it does make sense. He has chosen a lot of different paths since his time as a protester, including becoming a born-again Christian, and one can't expect him to sing anti-war jingles all his life, nor want him to, in my case. (Leave that to Toby Keith!)

The Rolling Stones didn't allow their songs to be commercialized until "Start Me Up," was featured in Windows 95 ads, and their music has been peppered across the dial ever since, and the Beatles' music is normally covered by modern acts.

But I'm not going to stand in Bob's way, nor am I really going to care. There are bigger causes to strive for, I believe, than environmental friendliness through the resistance from commercialism, and he may be wanting to strive for those causes through his radio program, which was plugged, thanks to Caddy.

And it's hard to blame the modern musician, either. Today's music industry is changing vastly, and the evolution of the rock star's relationship with the 20-second ad is, too, as critics' favs Wilco are reaching the masses with their music via Volkswagen commercials.

"With the commercial radio airplay route getting more difficult more many bands, we see this as another way to get the music out there," the band told their fans on their Website. "And we feel okay about VWs. Several of us even drive them."

Tag: bobdylan lynyrdskynyrd thewho wilco

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